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I recently came across some posts in Google… posts from people out there talking about a failed relationship, how much their suffering, about how hard the finding getting over their exes…
It struck me that the words they used in their posts to describe their situation were mostly negative. This of course is a reflection of their inner reality: words are generally an external representation of what is going on inside, unless of course you are lying… which in this case it’s safe to assume those people aren’t.
The point is, if those people think it’s hard to get over their exes, then it is.
If this is you, and you truly want to get over your ex as fast as you can (and as effectively as you can) then the first thing you need to change is your attitude. Stop using concepts in the negative sense, such as:
- relationship pain
- relationship anguish
- broken relationship
- etc… (anything that implies you are completely broken or on the junk pile)
Remove yourself emotionally for a moment: your relationship failed. That is neither good nor bad – it just days. If you weren’t getting along with your ex, then I’d say your breakup was a positive thing. Wouldn’t you?
The bottom line is that whether you like it or not you broke up. The fact is that if you want to get over it, you’re going to have to start picking up the pieces sooner rather than later, and if you keep bombarding your brain with thoughts of anguish, pain, misery, loneliness etc… on a daily basis, then this is simply going to create an attitude that is going to find getting over the relationship a very hard thing to achieve.
There’s nothing wrong with talking about a failed relationship (why should there be?) There is no shame in it either – it’s just a fact, alas a sad one. But you can start to use words with less emotional impact, and being as factual as possible (in the world, removing emotion as much as possible).
So swap failed relationship with a Relationship that didn’t work out… and so on. Ditch words like pain and misery from your vocabulary – at the least when you’re talking about your old relationship.
Changing your attitude is the first step in achieving freedom from this issue. Do it.
Check Out J Riley’s Breakup Book
Visit the homepage to see where you can buy The Breakup for Men