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This is a question that seems to plague almost everybody at least once in a while. Perhaps it is part of the human condition…
It’s not unusual for somebody to start wondering ‘what if’ after a breakup. If this is you, take solace in the fact that almost everybody does this.
However, having said this, do not get stuck in a rut with this. In fact, start to change the way you think.
Wondering what things would be like if you hadn’t split up, if your relationship was still thriving, is a pretty useless thought when you think about it. Nobody can answer this question. Guessing where you’d be today had you stuck with your ex is a waste of time and energy: you can guess something positive or something negative; the choice is yours. Either way that outcome never took place.
Wondering how things would be now if you had stayed with your ex or if your ex was still around is akin to keeping a foot firmly grounded in the past. This translates into an anchor: something that stops you from moving forward. And this ultimately translates into an underlying thread of stress constantly running somewhere deep in your subconscious.
Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, that thread will run in the background; that question will always be there: where would I be had I stuck around with my ex?
Realize the futility this was thought. There simply is no right answer. Instead, embrace the fact that you’re no longer with your ex. When you do this you will feel that life suddenly starts to feel a little nicer and things start to run a little smoother, and all because you’ve shut down that internal ever-running thread of stress.